Sparks of growth

Just doing some beautifications

While staying in Utrecht, the city where my house lives, I felt a sense of confined freedom. Yearning for communal living in nature, I set out to find a place of nurture. My desire for growing food had grown each time I thought about the taste-less produce I bought in supermarkets, so I set out to find a communal food garden. After considering joining a small family oriented garden next to the railway track behind my house, I remembered why I never was attracted to it as much: it was not lively (most days empty) and just seemed like a playground for events. (Plus I always felt reluctant to eat veggies grown under the constant churn of railway blasted iron.)
But when searching online I found an organization named Food for Good, which sees many volunteers working in their paradise garden every single day! It has a very simple approach: you can show up when you feel like it and either just be there or take on some activity from the list of chores. No pressure, only invitation. Just the way I like to live!

So far I am really happy to have become part of the group, and feel at home every time I come. I enjoy myself getting to know one another, and this simple way of being is rewarding me at every step with joy and wonder. Such different people with such different backgrounds, all enjoying the fruits of the paradise they feel they belong. Some have had recent hardships to endure, others are social glue that bind the ones that might feel a bit separate. Introvert and outgoing characters sometimes joining in shared activities, at other times enjoying the calm of working alone in nature. Plus we get to taste this wonderful labour of love, when offered to take home some of the days harvest :)

Western “democracies” are quietly arresting dissidents

More journalists arrested in the west

Shocked to find out the truth behind our veneer of “freedom” and “democracy”, I started keeping a list of influential journalists, professors, social justice activists and free speech defenders arrested in western “democracies” since the last Russo-Ukrainian war began in 2022. I will keep updating this regularly. Creation date of this article was Sept 3, 2024, so just check the additions to the list below since then. See how quickly this all turned sideways since august 2024 (after Keir Starmer took over)!

Most on this list are charged under some vague recent sweeping anti-terrorism acts, effectively gagging the people in question and shutting them up while held under surveillance without further notice.

Note that mainstream media mostly do not, or are not allowed (by their respective govts) to report on these arrests. Many western governments have installed laws enforcing censorship in secret, making it extremely hard for the public to know the truth. One would have to do independent research as sources reporting on the true matter of events exist, but are made hard to find or deranked by algorithms of the co-opted media platforms (such as Google, Twitter and Facebook, all US owned and thus under control by the NSA).

Do you think you have intellectual freedom?

Some background regarding current censorship in the west

You see, most large influential news networks in the world are now operating under the so called “Trusted News Initiative”, effectively controlling the (non)dissemination of influential information. In effect they are censoring or framing information to fit the purposes as laid out by overarching (inter)national security agencies which were injected into their process. The COVID pandemic was used as the perfect moment to install this machinery and push forward sweeping regulations making most of this unseen to the public.
The original “five eyes” (the first 5 national security agencies collaborating on almost everything) have now grown to include even more countries dependent on the protectorate, collaborating in secret to help keep hegemonic control of the world (mostly by demonizing the “others”, to gain support for far reaching measures such as sanctions, with side effects such as fueling far-right views and racism all over the world), and have firmly taken control of western media.
(Where is the proof you may ask? Obviously not to be found in mainstream media anymore.)
You will have to start slow thinking in order not to succumb to such tricks, and keep looking beyond the simplistic narratives of the propaganda machines.

To help those interested I have created an independent news app that helps with finding out what is going on in the world for real ;)

Important notes:
This list excludes the hundreds of people local to crisis areas / war zones that were killed or arrested based on their ethnicity, and are rarely reported on. In this list I focus on famous people that are inhabitants of countries in the west, as their arrests are likely to receive more attention (and thus hopefully more condemnation) from viewers.

Those unchecked at the end are the names of people the hegemonic powers would like to see silenced, and could be next. Coordinated smear campaigns are already rampant against them, demonizing them and attacking their persons as psychologically unstable (a very popular attack nowadays). The combination of such cheap tactics are likely to trick the lazy brains of the public into the “where there is smoke there must be fire” stance on the matter, setting them up for future arrests or degradation of powers.

The current list

(Please tell me if I left out anybody, so I can update it ;)

– [x] Kit Klarenberg (UK, May 17, 2024): GrayZone reporter. Interrogated over “political views” after the GrayZone was revealing the true motives behind the Russia-Ukraine war.
– [x] Scott Ritter (USA, August 7, 2024): in depth reporting and analysis on the Middle East and Russia-Ukraine war, showing the true disasters unfolding, with strong emphasis on the military perspective.
– [x] Richard Medhurst (UK, August 15, 2024): in depth reporting and analysis on the Middle East, and vocal critic of the remaining apartheid regime proclaiming to be a democracy (Israel).
– [x] Mary Kostakidis (Australia, August 2024): Australian journalist and political commentator informing the public about sexual assault fabrications created by Israeli propagandists. Accused by Israeli govt linked agency of “supporting ethnic cleansing of Jews” after two retweets.
– [x] Danny Shaw (USA, August 28, 2024): Professor and activist speaking out against social injustice and the current unfolding catastrophe in the Middle East. In May 2024, before this arrest, he was arrested, doxxed and subsequently fired from his job at the College of Criminal Justice in New York. For protesting against the genocide in Gaza
– [x] Sarah Wilkinson (UK, August 28, 2024): activist fighting for human rights and social justice, highlighting the hypocrisy in the west around the unfolding genocide in the Middle East.
– [x] Richard Barnard (UK, August 29, 2024): Founder of Palestine Action, leading activists to fight against Israel’s genocide and for the rights of Palestinians to exist. 
– [x] Pavel Durov (France, August 31, 2024): Owner of free speech platform Telegram. (He was effectively arrested because he guarantees safety and privacy and thus won’t build a backdoor for governments/hackers for surveillance, unlike all US based platforms that have to comply to such arrangements by NSA decree)
– [x] Michael Lacey (USA, 4 sept 2024): Owner of Backpage, a Craigslist alternative. He was arrested for “facilitating prostitution” because his platform was used to place legitimate ads for meetings between individuals that subsequently engaged in illegal acts !?
– [x] Steven Thrasher (USA, 5 sept 2024): Assistant professor of journalism, author and journalist mainly focused on LGBTQ+ issues, but moved focus on the genocide in Gaza. Suspended for standing up for Palestinian rights.
 

Who’s next?

Many people stand up to counter the propaganda of the neocon’s instigated/funded wars and atrocities against mankind all over the globe. The wave of political arrests is increasing, and it is very likely that people on this “next” list are targeted some time soon. They are likely to first get harassed on many levels and targeted with smear campaigns (trolled) before actually being arrested, as that never looks good from a PR perspective.

– [ ] Col. Douglas MacGregor (USA, ?): Military analyst and commentator discussing the war in Ukraine and the Israel-Palestine conflict. Offers a realistic view of the balance of powers in the current multi-polar world, which is not what the hegemony tries to portray. His network in the military and political arena make it harder for the establishment to neutralize him in public. 
– [ ] Chris Pavlovski (Canada, ?): Owner of free speech platform Rumble. France also threatened his platform as well so after Pavel Durov’s arrest he left Europe to escape potential indictment/arrest.
– [ ] Elon Musk (USA, ?): Owner of free speech platform X. Likely to keep his freedom as he is the owner of the most important low-orbit satellite array in the world, which is currently very much needed and used by the western military alliance.

Rebelution

“If anything happens just make it go away. Get rid of anything suspicious. I don’t care what you do. Make it look like an accident or whatever if you can’t clean up the mess.”
Sir Jared’s remote instructions to his robot servants in the field were acknowledged as the screen’s moving dots all signaled in sync.

(His father tasked him with preserving their precious ancient real-estate and all the land their family amassed over the past centuries. It was practically given to them by those who could not afford to pay the fees for owning their own.)

It was a bit of an organizing feat but after many meetings with GAME’s AI advisors the control mechanism was online and any authorized person could interface with it with their level of clearance. Jared was using level “D” (for Daedalus), which was also known as God mode.

So far there were a few hiccups, but without repercussions for the family of course. No, it was just a matter of fine tuning the AI instructions, so he learned. If one leaves too much room for the AI to interpret, it seems to fall back to its military training, which is not very stealth and does not care about the mess it leaves behind. Luckily the biggest incident with land dwellers that came in its way so far involved just one family, and Jared’s instructions to make it look like a dramatic family affair were executed satisfactorily.

But the inevitable could not be stopped, and the family was preparing for an influx of bodies from other sites. Since the global attempt to bring UBI and guarantee basic human rights never came to fruition, the predicted statistics were starting to play out. Masses of displaced people started roaming for food and shelter. The Family Traditions Alliance was well aware of these outcomes even before these last years of socioeconomic disintegration. They simply chose to strengthen their control, instead of backing the AI Governance movement (which would dilute their statue to mere cultural artifacts), and used their AI network to sabotage any effort that would threaten their hegemony. It would be pointless they thought, as the sheep need to be herded by the families, as they always have been. “Surely no AI could be expected to do that as gracefully as the families always have?”, Jared thought smugly, convinced this was true.

He was looking forward to meeting his father tonight, who was advising congress today how to handle these growing groups of uncontrollable masses that were scrambling to get their basic needs met. He was chosen by the heads to present the plan of The Families (as the alliance is also known to go by). This revolved around the idea to establish HEALTH areas where anybody’s basic needs were met, and then some: education, entertainment, cooperation, whatever one wishes to do within its perimeter. Of course all this would work in a controllable fashion, as laid out in the all encompassing vision of The Families’ eNET AI. The Families were not sure about the potential of supporting this large number of bodies, but they supported eNET’s conclusion to keep them around for potential future benefit. (And to let sleeping dogs lie of course.)

80 weeks

“80 days” is now “80 weeks”

I was wrong about the timeframe and had to change the title of my semi-fictional short story, but its content is unfolding as we speak.

The outline:
80 weeks ago, an incursion of Hamas has seen the lives taken of over a thousand Israeli civilians (many of whom were killed by the IDF itself under their Hannibal Directive as confirmed by Haaretz, and first exposed by the GrayZone). This led to a global condemnation by the international community, and a swift and consequent response by the Israeli govt. Now, after years of indiscriminate bombing, flattening all of Gaza and the West Bank and the ruthless killing and torture of all Palestinians, Israel has just ended the “final war”, and over an estimated 7 million Palestinians were slaughtered, while only a few Palestinians managed to escape into Egypt. Israel has thus gotten rid of their long time self proclaimed “enemy” and thinks it can finally breathe and live in peace. A TV editorial piece covering this “normalization of Israeli day to day life” is aired on CNN on a TV in the background, while two western journalists have coffee complaining that they were not allowed to film anything on the ground what was happening, and that over 1000 journalists who tried were murdered by the IDF.

The story:
(credits to ChatGPT)

In a quaint café just adjacent to the newsroom, two Western journalists, Jessica and Henry, sipped their coffees, bitterness lingering not just in their cups but in the atmosphere around them. A sleek, glossy television hung on the wall, presenting an editorial piece on CNN that was saturated with juxtaposed images of serene Israeli landscapes and the triumphant echoes of victory, contrasted against the haunting stillness of a decimated Gaza and West Bank.
Jessica squinted at the screen, her fingers nervously circling the rim of her porcelain mug. “They’ve dubbed it ‘The Final War’,” she murmured, a sardonic chuckle scarcely concealed beneath her words, “over 18 months of brutal ethnic cleansing and a death toll that numbers in the millions, yet somehow ‘peace’ is the word dancing on every anchor’s lips.”

Henry, his eyes reflecting the somber ashes of the devastated Palestinian territories, nodded. “Peace, they say, is what remains when the dust settles. But this? This is a graveyard silence.”
The TV editorial, narrated with a meticulously measured tone of optimism, waxed lyrical about the “new dawn” for Israel, a nation that could now breathe without the shroud of enmity suffocating its day-to-day. And yet, the two journalists, tethered to the ethical chords of their profession, could not ignore the specter of those 2 million souls hovering above the freshly claimed tranquility.

The screen showed children in Israel, jubilant and carefree, playing on swings and in schools that were once shuttered by the looming threats of conflict. Their laughter resonated in a place where, merely miles away, the laughter of other children had been permanently silenced.
Jessica spoke again, “In an oddly perverse way, it seems like an apt conclusion, doesn’t it? We wage wars, spill blood, and then, just sit back and mold narratives. We weren’t allowed to film the horror, to showcase the raw truth to the world.”

Henry’s gaze remained fixated on the screen, “Because, Jess, the stories of agony won’t feature in the victory parades. The architects of ‘peace’ are the ones scripting the tales for history. Our lenses, capable of capturing the tears and fears, are replaced by poised pens forced to write op-eds that echo the triumphant horns of the victors.”

Their coffees, once steaming and lively, now sat cold in their cups, as did the remnants of a war that seemed, in its aftermath, to have settled into a perilously comfortable obscurity.
Behind them, the TV continued its broadcast, ignorant to the sentiments simmering in the hearts of those who knew that peace, authentic and enduring, was not crafted from the bones of obliterated nations. It was, instead, forged in the fires of understanding, compassion, and coexistence – elements all but erased from the scene they had so tragically been barred from documenting.

Their conversation, shrouded in cynicism yet punctuated with an unsettling truth, unfurled against a backdrop of calculated narratives and stark, unspoken realities. The world watched, applauded, or shook heads in distant disapproval, but the echoes from the rubble were drowned out, suppressed beneath the jubilant cries of a peace that came at an unspeakable cost.

As they left the café, the journalists, guardians of untold stories, cast a final, lingering glance towards the screen – a mirror reflecting a future where stories of unimaginable despair would remain buried beneath triumphalist tales of victory. And therein, in that reflection, the irony of a ‘peaceful tomorrow’ met the ghosts of yesterday’s devastation, forever entwined in a dance of veiled truths and unmasked atrocities.

About intellectual freedom

Does this topic appeal to you?

In my opinion to become intellectually free involves a curious, open and conscious mind able to investigate what is holding one in its grip (captive). It involves willingness to see the (un)conscious subjugation to one side of a story, to detect one’s (willful) ignorance of the other side (the unknown). Once an individual detects their own polarization on an issue, they have a chance to investigate the blind spots surrounding the matter and gather new insights.

Now, you might be an intellectual with deep philosophical understanding of the world, yet we all suffer from blind spots. Sometimes those blind spots are temporarily uncovered yet quickly buried because of cognitive dissonance. Autonomous thinkers tend to withstand the pull of the majority stance on polarizing issues, but they are but a small fraction of mankind, and the majority of people still care too much what their peers think. Autonomous or not, we all suffer from the blind spots unknown to us, that have never been uncovered before.

Because in essence the mind is lazy, and always tries to come up with simple corroborating views that defend the “known”. The neurons in our brain are operating in a Last In First Out (LIFO) way, making knowledge with the most neural affirmations more important and harder to counter. It is designed that way for many reasons that served us in our scary past in the wilderness, but you probably know that and I digress. I think striving for intellectual freedom implies understanding this, and means embracing strategies that counter this innate “regressive” nature of our brain’s frontal cortex. I say regressive here as I believe as humans we are able to use our latest biological upgrade to not give in to our basic animalistic instincts when that is not desirable.

In this short piece I intend to lay out a strategy of questioning oneself, in order to help with uncovering the influences withholding you from seeing the bigger picture, the totality of any issue. In the end I will give you a practical exercise to help you see where you are in your current journey to become intellectually free.

(WARNING: the implications can be severe as it might lead to falling out with groups that demand your blind and “loyal” onesidedness. Are you prepared for that?)

This list is far from complete, but you can begin by asking yourself the following questions. (Many of these touch upon/overlap the same psychological phenomena, yet readers may resonate with one over the other. The point is to uncover these workings.)

  1. Do I tense up when I receive information unknown to me? Tension is detrimental to an open stance, to cooperation. Cooperation is key to understanding, because it is only through other perspectives that we can escape our own intellectual bubble.
  2. Do I tend to find opposing arguments to reject new perspectives? In other words, am I dominated by an egocentric intellect that (again) tends to reject new knowledge in order to hold on to your own “intelligence gathering”? An “open mind” strategy can more effectively gather new insights, whilst the energy lost in a “rejective” mindset would be better used in the (cooperative) pursuit of knowledge.
  3. Do I tend to reject arguments that do not fit my internal status quo? This is similar to the second question, yet it directly points to the resistance towards questioning a particular belief system one has deeply identified with. It is here that we probably tense up most, as our brain’s neural network is “short circuited” in a way, to make new connections, yet the old connections are fighting to stay alive and relevant.
  4. Am I challenging the viewpoints I gathered over time? Over time we might have (subconsciously) taken on one-sided narratives either fed to us or subconsciously chosen by us (that support an identified belief system). As an intellectual it is foolish to think that we are free from our psychological tendencies, and as such one needs a birds eye view on oneself in the bigger context. Luckily it only needs an open mindset to investigate this.
  5. Am I voicing simplistic arguments that align with those in power? Do you intuitively feel that you are ignoring a more nuanced view? This is an indication that deeper investigation into the matter is needed. It is all too easy to feel supported by the populist stance on something, simply by feeling one is part of a majority. Yet any intellectual seeking freedom is always ready to do the work of diving deeper into any issue that begets a one sided presentation, especially in support of powers with vested interests. The moment one becomes aware of this should surely trigger alarm bells.
  6. Is my reasoning free from fallacies? Are you aware of the mental gymnastics your mind has to perform in order to try to defend your previously held beliefs? Do you understand the corrosive dynamics of believing such fabrications over truth?

Do you think you are already aware of these inner workings of your psyche? It not only requires the acquired mindset as described, but it involves an active awareness throughout our walk of life, moment to moment, decision after decision. It is very easy to fall back to our ancestral patterns of giving in to those appealing to our basic fears, or to carefully “planted” belief systems. The pull of our brain neurons, shaped year over year, are hard to ignore, yet an intellectual wants to understand this and take the bigger picture into account to let in new and more revealing insights.

Great, you made it this far and are probably hungry for some practical application. Let’s see how our “reactive” mind responds to the following topics, and if we can navigate towards “freedom from the known” and gain more comprehensive insights.

  1. How do you view racism? (Unfortunately the word “racism” implies multiple races, yet there is only one race: the human race.) This implies favoring one (usually bigger) group of humans over another based on their ethnicity, skin color, or any other traits they are not responsible for. You might think you are free from this, but let me give you some examples that might trigger your defenses:
    • Should muslims have more or less rights than Christians? Easy question that can have an easy answer. If you favor one over the other, does that involve mental gymnastics to make it seem “right”?
    • Is the Israeli government involved in systematic oppression of the Palestinian people? Do you think they seem to use sophisticated methods like propaganda and ad-hoc fabricated lies in response to events to influence the world’s perspective? Do you think they are involved in the abuse of basic human rights? There is ample work done by researchers/scholars to get to the facts and deeper insights. Are you voicing only their arguments, or do you want to know what is really happening?
    • Is democracy for everybody or just some select group(s)?
      This touches upon equal chances for everybody and basic human rights. Again, what is happening in your mind? Do you feel a pull towards favoritism? What is the reasoning involved? Is it convincing/appealing to some basic instinct?
  2. How do you view speciesism? This is the view that one animal’s life is more valuable than the other, and should be protected from harm/slaughter. (Cats ‘n dogs over pigs, that way of thinking.) Let me ask the following in particular to get a it closer to your defenses:
    • Do you care about sentient beings’ (humans/animals) suffering unnecessarily? What would be the consequence of that stance for your daily life? In your version of paradise, would you kill other beings for pleasure? Knowing we already live in a world with abundant food options and science showing us that a plant based diet is the healthiest, does your mind reject this? If so, what thoughts are coming up? Are mental gymnastics involved (fallacies in reasoning)? Are you willing to do work to investigate this? Is that worth it?

Those are just some issues I came up with that seem to have a polarizing effect in the world. I am curious to hear where you are in your journey towards intellectual freedom, and what other issues you think deserve more honest attention.

(Trolls and propaganda accounts will be banned. Please be constructive!)

Ängsbacka revisited: in with the new…

My second time in Ängsbacka was amazing, again. But different. Because of the familiarity I felt more comfortable with the family and the program. I did not go through as deep a spiritual journey as the first time, but became aware of these new insights: that staying mindful, connected with the now, is threatened by living in repetition. The body stores away sensations and experiences in deeper, less conscious parts. As to make way for new things. But in that growing feeling of family I also felt a deeper love, one that grows by proximity. We were caring, loving, expressing, enjoying, massaging, playing. We came so close and grew so much love, that I started connecting more to my bigger purpose: to enrich each others lives by being me, in all my beautiful facets. Living a life from simplicity, not adding to noise. Bringing clarity and joy. And touch! Didn’t I say to myself last year that I would start doing massage courses? Didn’t do any, not yet. But I did massage every day at Ängsbacka again, which fuelled my determination to really make it my main practice.

But I also became more aware of me rejecting what I have in me. Could I integrate it all? Maybe there was a way to take my old career into the next evolutionary stage: instead of programming myself, maybe I could use my enthusiasm and knowledge to evangelise my technological vision. So I built out my vision into a demo stack and had around 10 interviews, all aimed at becoming just that: leading tech teams into the future of computer automation. None worked out. Mostly because I could not commit to a year long of full time work, and sometimes because it wasn’t a good fit or timing, but also because I didn’t fully believe in my own silly endeavour to get back in. So I was done playing that game. Universe says no!

At the same time it became clear that I had to go to Mexico, because my parked car had to be removed. The family I paid to watch over it said police started asking questions and neighbours started talking about it. So in January 2018 I booked a ticket, and early February I went back, together with a friend. We traveled from Cancún to Tulum with the car, and stayed at the beach for almost 3 weeks. Only relaxing, swimming, exercising in the water and on the beach, doing yoga and having fun. And dealing with my new found family of beach lovers. Many beautiful souls, but also a lot of dysfunctional men that were yearning for love and peace inside. They had attached so deeply to their identities, that they didn’t want to or couldn’t let go off them. These identities were major obstacles on the path to freedom and sensitivity (which is needed to be in direct contact with reality), but their innate need for love and connection revealed itself over and over through smiles and talks. I was grateful to be there. It felt as if I was needed there.

My friend went back to NL and it was time to move on. Some of the beach family joined and we journeyed via Bacalar to Palenque. Here I stopped to help out a friend from Tulum, who was overwhelmed by his duty taking care of two friends that ended up in hospital after a psychosis. I thought my grounding presence might help, and so we walked, ate, felt, touched, slept, and then decided to do a road trip to San Cristobál de las Casas. Slowly reality came back to them, but we felt trapped in the city. So we decided to continue to San Marcos La Laguna, Lago Atitlán. My friends fully recovered in that last week there, being in nature, paddling on the water, and making plans to go back home. And when they did I was grateful to have met them, and care for them. Such wonderful people!

Del Lago

I stayed in San Marcos over a month and found a new and nurturing family. Such a spiritual vortex! Ecstatic dance every week, chocolate ceremonies, stunning views and nature. But most of all, so many open people leading their own open life. Vulnerability and uncertainty are at the center of being, hiding nothing, without pretense. It was there that I came across the Shiatsu course of Lazio Luna, and so I decided to jump in. It felt so natural! I received many compliments affirming I was on the right path. Every time I gave someone a massage I felt rejuvenated. I was meditating on their bodies, being only in the moment with what was in front of me. I felt such alignment and sense of purpose! During my time in San Marcos I also felt a growing need to put all of my strengths and qualities into service, not only through touch. I have witnessed people gain more clarity in my presence many times. When I connect with the source and step into the flow of universal wisdom, it feels as if that wisdom is revealing itself through the words coming out of my mouth. But only in full awareness of what is now, and staying connected to just that. Not going into ideas, nor judgement, nor patterns of thought, nor any of those tricks of the mind that make you lose contact with reality.

So I am trying to capture my simplistic views into writings. To support others, but also myself in crafting invitations for upcoming meetings. Because there lies a greater potential for healing the mind: helping each other discover and break through the veils we created ourselves. Finding your own blind spots can be very hard ;) And maybe I will be able to combine my gifts into a powerful session: helping to relax through massage and touch, and creating clarity in life. Ultimately leading to that peaceful trust in life and oneself, however uncertain the future may be :)

My first Ängsbacka: out with the old…

After working for over 8 months I was in pain. I needed to make a shift. I was invited to join a community in Sweden organising conscious festivals. My first experience in Ängsbacka in the summer of 2016 was life altering. After 3 beautiful days there I decided to stay longer than the initial week planned, and ended up staying 7 weeks.

We worked, ate,  shared, swam, danced, expressed, sang, loved, everything together in Harmony. That is also when I started massaging people regularly (almost daily in the sauna), because it felt as a calling and I needed more practice. I became so healthy in body, mind and soul, that I decided not to go back to my unhealthy old line of work: crafting software for money. Instead I would focus on massage.

So I also decided to travel away from my concrete environment and keep moving my body. Luckily Dariush (whom I met at Ängsbacka) visited my house and never left: he became a dear friend and brother, and offered to take care of the house and Airbnb guests for me, while even paying rent for the penthouse on top. I booked a ticket to California, bought a car to travel with and had an amazing time there with friends and nature. Then I drove south to Mexico, travelled around and stayed in Baja (which is an awesome place by the way) for over a month at Proyecto Amor with friends.

17 days of silence followed in the Hridaya yoga school in Mazunte, followed by another 21 days of yoga module 1. Such bliss and revelations, and such wonderful people! I did find out that such a controlled life in a retreat community is not for me, as it is mostly aimed at letting die of the old. There was no attention for life in all it’s facets, and the whole of my being yearned for expression and exploration.

By chance my dear friend Shay (whom I befriended the summer before in Ängsbacka) also arrived in Mazunte, and we became brothers seeing each other daily. I was pointed towards “embodiment” by him: every moment in life is to be felt, and through relaxation one can de-arm old patterns of contraction. He had learned a lot through his relationship with Aisha Salem. I already understood what I needed, but mostly from the mind: flow with what is, remove any resistance. But now Shay made it seem more practical. When emotions are felt, be present with the feelings and relax. Relaxing away contractions that stemmed from trauma made it lose it’s grip on the body.

Shay suggested reading Krishnamurti. After reading “Freedom from the Known” and “The awakening of Intelligence” my life had become even simpler than before. Being with what is, and becoming aware of the tricks of the mind that take me away from the now, was my major concern. As always I trusted myself to know what to do when it needed to be done, and so I set out on this new path of embodiment. It felt like a relief to embrace the fullness of life, instead of becoming a teacher at Hridaya, which I had contemplated on before while in stillness. Life it is!

Shay joined me going back to the Netherlands, where he would live in my house and deal with my Airbnb guests, and I would be going back for my second summer in Ängsbacka :) I felt so grateful to have been living an organic and adventurous life, and now it was time to go see my family again: my blood relatives, as well as my hippie brothers and sisters! Me, Shay and Dariush lived for some weeks together and shared many stories and emotions, such brotherhood! But then came the time for the next summer in Ängsbacka, and so Dariush left in his travel van, while I took my own car som days later, and we set out for Sweden once more.

DevSurplus is there to help

After a life of working as a professional geek in web technology I came to a crossroads. I acknowledged the call to use my experience and knowledge not only for my own benefit, but for a larger cause, for that of society. A couple of years ago I started investigating other areas to venture into, that would be more in tune with my journey as a human being. I joined different groups of creatives and artists and had a lot of learning experiences and fun. But then I became part of a growing community of people that understand the need for personal leadership. Almost every week I got to experience and contribute to a lot of workshops and events, by and for the community. Bringing tools to the table that allow for the whole to become more than the sum of its parts. I witnessed beautiful moments with different people working so well together when given the right tools, safety and guidance. So empowering! Each step made me more aware of my strengths and weaknesses, and the reward when going beyond them.

I decided to work on my weaknesses, but also to hold onto my strengths and to use them, recognizing a global need to work together towards a sustainable future. And in this movement there is a place for smart machines and knowledge engineering that help achieve these goals. Information needs to be shared, knowledge applied, and audiences reached.

So I decided to bring together resources from the IT industry with interesting organizations and companies that make a difference in life. To allow professionals like me to connect and work with good causes and inspiring entrepreneurs and leaders. After 15 years of growth as a professional in web technology I have a good understanding what is needed and what can be done to create intelligent and robust internet services and applications. I have also taught and mentored pupils with what I know and love about technology. But these last couple of years have also made me realize my strengths as a human being, and that is to connect with others and inspire them to go beyond the usual.

My Philosophy

I have come to a simple philosophy, which can be written as such:

“As a digital developer/creative I wan’t to do something good with my skills for my community or the world at large, and in that order (start local, go global).”

It builds on the following assumptions:

  • “we” are (potential) digital developers and creatives and we love what we do
  • we are spiritual beings (as opposed to machines) and have a need for purpose in life, and want to connect with others and contribute to something greater than ourselves
  • we like to meet each other regularly and work together in real life
  • developers are well paid for their work and can therefore work less to provide for income
  • developers would thus like to commit some spare time to contribute their strengths to a greater cause
  • there are companies and organisations out there that need our help and expertise
  • together with them we are capable of identifying their need for digital technology and capable of defining and realizing possible solutions
  • we are capable of starting up projects, organisations or companies for causes we identify ourselves if this is needed
  • we can be self sustaining, by giving enough of our time and teaching others our skills and about our community tools, principles and best practices
  • together, and in a transparent way me make up what these tools, principles and best practices are all about
  • It is ok to create revenue from work, as long as this work serves the greater cause
  • it is not ok to create services for one’s own profit, and dress it up with feel-good sauce and labels to make it look acceptable

And that is how DevSurplus came into being. Let’s hope you hear from it some time in the future :)

Hosted Beings was born

After two years of designing workshops and gaining experiencing with relevant techniques and settings, we decided to start a company around the Art of Hosting. Me and my two friends Joost and Marien had been ‘stepping up’ on many occasions, and felt the natural urge to combine our strengths and serve the world.

We sat down each wednesday, when each of us was able to find time for our endeavours. Each time we got a little closer to each other, and a little further with our plans.
But to go ahead we first had to apply the Art of Hosting steps to ourselves. So we laid down our own Chaordic Stepping Stones and derived a shared purpose and vision. Then we thought long and hard about the way we would introduce our services, and were hoping to come up with some concrete product form. But this isn’t easy, as the AoH approach involves a lot of knowledge, principles and techniques.

In the end we all thought it would be beneficial for organisations to let us host their key moments, like important meetings, to allow them to see how people can work together in efficient and empowering ways. But that’s when we got in touch with our first client. An organisation comprised of hundreds of employees and thousands of psychiatric clients, having heard of the AoH, and wanting to get involved. After many talks we are almost there, and waiting for them to sign off on our first workshop. Exciting times!

Coach Surfing: next steps

After 5 sessions of Coach Surfing this year, my fellows from De Universiteit and I felt the urgence for taking our form of peer coaching to the next level. We sat down with a core group of four people and decided we should host a series of gatherings for those willing to step up and participate. The first of these gatherings last week, with no less than seven passionate people was very fruitful, and brought a lot of insight into what’s needed for this organic group to grow. Two new members came to the round table, willing to inject their passion and knowledge with regards to coaching and group dynamics. Wonderful!

Not only that, we also managed to find a very inspiring place to host these sessions: Huis a/d Werf in Utrecht, a stage/meeting place for the arts and the creative industry. They immediately saw the possible synergy between our group and the people that come there during the day, working by themselves and with others on their own projects.
Now we have 4 dates lined up there, till the end of the year, with 2 sessions each month, one afternoon and one evening (to cater to those who work 5 days a week :).

For the next phase in our evolution we foresee more people stepping up, bringing their knowledge, tools and baggage to the table, with the hope that the group will be self organizing, as an organic and flat structure, allowing room for those who are willing to add to the mix of peer coaching potential.
We also hope to quickly cristallize this vision and knowledge into  guidelines and tools, enabling others to take Coach Surfing wherever they see fit.

All of this we do for free, because we have felt how wonderful it is to be coached by each other, and believe that our work together ultimately leads to a better world, through refection, mindfulness and helping each other.
I do hope however, that by immersing myself into this new way of thinking and collaborating, that it might one day be feasible to sustain myself through this work I so much enjoy ;)